Dilemmas...

So I have 2 dilemmas to contemplate.

First, and probably the least difficult choice to make, yet still undesirable, would be talking to the adoptive step mother- Zoe about something she said to Sarah last night.

So the kids were out with her and my Dad last night, for supper. I have been having issues with Sarah about separation anxiety as well as a general anxiety that she seems to be going through. This has been going on for months, maybe even close to a year. She is well aware that I have been working on this issue with Sarah and that sleeping in her own bed, or coming in to my bed in the middle of the night has been an uphill battle for me to combat.
So anyway, doesn't she tell Sarah that it's OK to still sleep with Mommy, that Freda (her daughter) slept with her til she was 10 or more. Which I know isn't entirely true, as Dad was there a huge chunk of time by then.
Now I do realize that Sarah may have misunderstood what was being told to her, but I am just wondering if I should raise this issue with step mother to let her know that perhaps she should be aware of what she says to Sarah.
I had one hell of a time convincing her to sleep in her room after she came home, due to this conversation. It just takes so much out of me to have to help her work through this anxiety.

Do I send her an email or not? and If I do, how do I politely tell her to watch what she says?


Second dilemma. Thanksgiving is fast approaching, and I committed to going out to the other family's house for dinner. The kids and I were at the house on Sunday for supper and while we there were given the guest list. Now I am feeling very uncomfortable with one of the members on the list. I haven't seen them for several years but I still don't feel comfortable being there with this person. I know it doesn't make sense, and I can't explain the feeling other than fear. She makes me VERY uncomfortable when she speaks to me, very intimidating. Now that being said I DO realize that I haven't seen her in years, but I just don't like putting myself in situations that will trigger certain feelings in me. After just having gone through the past year that I have, I am in a good place, well a far better place than I was say 2 months ago....I don't want to go back to that place.
She hasn't done anything to me other than say some things that really made me feel horrible, and she probably has changed since then as well... but I just don't want to go there and worry about it. On the other hand other people on the list are people I am looking forward to seeing as they were very supportive and helpful to me in May when I was stuck out of town with the kids and couldn't drive due to my broken ankle. I would really hate to miss them.
The kids won't be with me, so it's not like the grand parents will miss me much with all the company they have. But if I decide not to go, how do I tell them that I won't be there?

Ahhhh...Life, full of fun stuff it is!!!!

:(

Annie